Rebuilding Hope: Angelina Theodora's Lessons in Resilience and Service
Every job that comes from the heart has its own meaning and risks. On one hand, a person can feel joy because their work brings change to others. But on the other hand, there's optimism and positive energy that keeps flowing out but might neglect to be replenished.
Humanitarian workers are one of the professions that have this character, especially when they have to plunge into emergency response. Chaotic and sometimes harrowing situations, witnessing loss, and striving for safety put immense pressure. Everything must be done quickly and accurately, so it's not just physical strength that's tested, but also mental readiness.
Angelina Theodora, currently serving as the National Director of Wahana Visi Indonesia, has filled much of her career journey in the humanitarian world through a series of emergency response programs. One valuable lesson she learned from this experience is the importance of ensuring that our hearts remain full of hope ready to be shared with others.
"I once left the humanitarian world. One of the reasons was after I participated in the earthquake emergency response in Gujarat, India. Before I was involved in the response in Gujarat, in 2000-2001 I was involved in other responses in India, moving from one area to another within months. Between 1999-2000 I was involved in disaster response in Timor Leste. At that time, I didn't realise that I was mentally exhausted because physically I felt fine," recounted the woman fondly called Angel.
The peak of physical and mental fatigue that Angel experienced occurred when she had to travel overland for dozens of hours to the epicentre of the earthquake in Gujarat. Throughout the journey, Angel and other emergency response teams had to witness so much grief and extreme vulnerability. "Every time we stopped to distribute emergency supplies, we listened to the grief of families searching for missing family members buried under the rubble. About a month later, I began to feel signs of mental fatigue, emotional instability. For example, suddenly wanting to cry at unexpected times and for no apparent reason. When this mental fatigue was also followed by physical fatigue because I had a fever and lost my appetite, finally in 2001 I decided to stop, I wanted to rest, and think about what I wanted to do next. Would the humanitarian world be my choice in the future?" she shared.
This experience was very valuable for Angel, learning about the importance of mental health and building personal resilience. For about three years, Angel decided to distance herself from the humanitarian world. In 2004, when one of the biggest disasters of the 21st century occurred, Angel decided to return. The Asian Tsunami, commonly known by Indonesians as the Aceh Tsunami, had an extraordinary impact on children and communities in several countries. At that time, World Vision was one of the non-governmental organisations that also became a first responder to help affected children and communities in Indonesia, India, Sri Lanka, and Thailand.
"I was contacted by World Vision India at that time. Actually, I had no plans to return to the humanitarian world, or to World Vision, but because it was WV India who called me, I felt God was giving me a chance to make up for my regret," Angel revealed.
Back to the First Love
Even though she had stepped away, the humanitarian world remained close to Angel's heart. She likened the humanitarian world to a first love. "The most memorable first experience. It gave me the opportunity to reflect as well. That there are jobs and services that I not only like but I can contribute to, doing good things," said the woman who has earned a master's degree from a university in Australia.
Her decision to leave the humanitarian world was actually very human. The very high intensity of emergency response work put Angel in a difficult position. Moving from one disaster response to another without a break made Angel miss the time to look inside herself until she finally burnt out.
"When I finished in 2001, because I was burnt out, I stopped with regret. I couldn't provide the best service at that time because I myself was too tired to serve," she recounted. Angel felt that humanitarian work was not just about the success of program implementation. But most importantly, it was about acting as a bridge of hope for the children and communities being assisted. As staff, if only fatigue, cynicism, and pessimism remained in the heart, it would be impossible to bring hope to anyone. The work was also done for achievement on paper alone, not bringing joy to the heart.
In a burnt-out condition, Angel realised that she was no longer able to work optimally. The decision to stop was taken in helplessness and dissatisfaction with her own work results. This was the source of Angel's regret.
Learning from this experience, Angel concluded, "It is okay to leave especially when you are leaving to invest in you. Repairing relationships with God, family, and yourself. Making yourself whole so you can come back with 100% too." Reflect regularly, whether we are still able to carry out the mission as a bearer of hope. Be sensitive to recognise whether we can still give our best or are at the point of saturation. Don't wait until you burn out because this condition is actually detrimental to yourself.
Maintaining Commitment, Nurturing Spirit
For 21 years, Angel has experienced the ups and downs of humanitarian work, mostly engaged in the humanitarian and emergency affairs sector outside of Indonesia. Angel has been part of World Vision's partnerships in Timor Leste, India, and Nepal. She began her work as the National Director of Wahana Visi Indonesia since 2021.
"Personally, the self-development I have felt most during my work with WVI is spiritual growth. Being a humanitarian worker with an organisation based on Christian values helps me to become a more complete person, always striving to align service work and personal actions and choices with the values I believe in," she revealed.
Her career is marked by her role as a female leader in various contexts. This experience and personal development greatly assist Angel in holding her role as National Director of WVI. However, for Angel, it is not just these things that are paramount. Living the organisation's values and principles is the most important thing. "I always emphasise to directors and managers that we must always be able to embrace change. Let's not preach to the community about change, but we ourselves are reluctant to change. If we don't live by the principle of change, how can we implement change?" she explained.
Commitment is one of the things Angel maintains in her current leadership. She has realised the importance of reflecting on and maintaining personal commitment, for herself and all Wahana Visi Indonesia staff. As a leader, she plays an important role in ensuring and valuing the commitment of each staff member. "Working with friends is one of the things I am grateful for. Every time I see staff committed to WVI when there might be opportunities elsewhere, it means a lot to me," she said.
Angel's decision to continue working in the humanitarian world came after taking a break and examining what had happened more thoroughly. Now, she maintains her commitment and nurtures her spirit by remembering how children and communities truly experience change. "Especially if children and communities can articulate authentically, how their partnership with WVI is. They can tell stories, not just because of WVI's assistance, but how their participation in bringing about changes in the community is," she said. She also consciously sets aside time to rest and distance herself from work to fill her heart. A full heart will support commitment and work spirit.
The risks of humanitarian workers are indeed quite large. But on the other hand, this work can also expand the heart. Angel herself has experienced it. "If you feel like filling your life with meaning, please go into the humanitarian world. As long as you can serve, serve with all your heart," she concluded.
Author: Mariana Kurniawati (Communication Executive)
